Moving on by Sign

Healthy ways to grieve and get over
major heartbreaks

by Judi Vitale

Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Your adrenaline-soaked way of dealing with things might make you think "moving on" is a no-brainer, but why leave a bunch of loose ends at the conclusion of a romance? If you've lost your temper in the process of breaking up, go back and apologize for that before you expect your former partner to talk to you in civil tones again. Then you can do all the reasonable things that must be done. Don't leave behind precious possessions and later hold a grudge because you never bothered to them back. Use your direct approach and take charge of the situation. Once any kind of anger and frustration has dissipated, you'll be able to treat your one-time lover with the same dignity you expect in return.

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Even if you're dead sure the surge of love you once felt has dissolved into a drizzle of indifference, it can be very hard for you to let go of a love affair. When you attach yourself to someone, your desire to protect your lover becomes a deeply ingrained habit, and so does everything else you ever did together. Rather than trying to continually breathe life into a horse that's been beaten to death more than once, use your determination to move away from past hurts. Make a project out of finding new friends, and eventually, finding fresh opportunities for love. When you take definite steps toward a new life, it gets much easier to let go of old behaviors that don't serve the betterment of your heart or head.

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
"Here today, gone tomorrow" might be the way you think you see all your relationships, but let's get honest. Deep down, underneath your apparent superficiality, lies a human being who wants to be loved and admired as much as anyone else. If you feel particularly wounded by a loss of love, take some time to mourn. Instead of jumping right back into the fray, spend time in solitude and get honest about what was good about the relationship, and why you think it failed. No matter how tempted you might be to close the door on the past and bolt-lock it for good, making the effort to understand the plusses and minuses of a relationship will pave the way to a much happier future.

Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
When you fall in love, the person you let into your life quickly becomes a member of your family. That's why you can become very devastated when a relationship goes bad. Although you might be tempted to crawl into your shell and not come out for quite some time, you can learn from a reasonable process of mourning and figure out ways to move on. Rather than looping sad MP3s on your player, listen to one or two tear-provoking songs, and then note that what you've just been through isn't really that bad. Even the saddest scenarios ever put to music eventually work themselves out. Work your way through your separation by reaching a point of forgiveness, and admit that there are things you can do better, too.

Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Breaking up, even if you're the one who insists upon it, can still damage your pride. You might try to hang onto a relationship long after it has out-lived its usefulness, simply because you don't want to be "wrong" about having chosen that partner in the first place. This is the kind of behavior that will only cause you grief and trouble. Often, "letting go" can be a mutually beneficial thing, as you relieve each other from the constant stresses of trying to maintain something that is no longer there. Talk about what you did that was good for one another rather than focusing on the bad stuff. Then, once you separate, you'll see this person was "right" for you, for the period of time you had together. With that happiness tucked in your pocket, move on to someone even better, even if that someone is you for a while.

Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
The first reaction you have to the end of a relationship might be excessive anxiety and a fear that there's something wrong with you. This is probably not even the case! When two people get together, both parties have a role in how well and whether the partnership works. Rather than taking everything as your own fault, try to see both sides of the story. Sometimes when you break up, it isn't because one of you is good and the other is bad -- it can be a simple case of discovering you just don't match. Use your analytical mind to see this possibility, and remember there's someone out there who really will be perfect for someone as special as you.

Moving on by Zodiac Sign | Tarot.com -- Continued »