Libra Teens (September 23 - October 22)
Good manners are essential to members of this sign, so you might just have lucked out. Even if a Libra teen has discovered (as all teens are known to do) that the parents are totally clueless, they might just be too polite to let you in on this disgrace. Social, courtly and elegant, they're usually out at a party, gathering or cotillion. When home, they're making plans to socialize. All of which means that you might make it out unscathed until you sink into the vortex of planning their wedding extravaganza.

Scorpio Teens (October 23 - November 21)
Scorpios have a very disturbing knack for seeing below the surface in situations and in people. Whatever your secrets are, this teen is in the loop. The good news is that they're seldom gossips because, although Scorpios love unearthing secrets, they don't like spilling them. But that doesn't mean your foibles will go unpunished. Manipulation is their strong suit, so Scorpio teens will use against you whatever comes in handy. Begging for mercy is fruitless, but you can turn the tables and blackmail them right back!

Sagittarius Teens (November 22 - December 21)
Happy go lucky and cheerful, this teen is usually quite laid-back. Yes, they nap at school, forget to take out the trash and never care if the dog is bathed or not. Yes, they have weird symbols etched into their coifs and get piercings in the strangest places. But no matter how scary teen Sagittarians look, they're still nice people. They help old ladies, laugh at your jokes and kindly say "hey, take a load off," when you're busy completing their chores.

Capricorn Teens (December 22 - January 19)
Did you ever consider adopting your accountant? Most people don't, but parents of Capricorns feel as though they have. It would seem that a child who wears business attire even to nap is making a sardonic statement, but that's not the case here. They just like looking professional. Capricorn teens don't have time to rebel. They're saving that for a mid-life crisis, which could be good news for a parent -- whose job is done by then. Meanwhile, this teen is working on their first million and chastising you for not performing better at your own goals.

Aquarius Teens (January 20 - February 18)
It's always nice to produce a child who is quite brilliant, even if thoroughly incomprehensible. Saving the world is what this kid is all about, and sometimes a parent feels like shouting, "Give it a rest." But it doesn't matter what a parent says or thinks, because Aquarius teens simply know better than you do. About everything. More stubborn than your crankiest aunt, more aloof than your high school nemesis, the only way to reach this teen is to stop, look and listen. They sometimes do have the right idea and they can usually fix your computer.

Pisces Teens (February 19 - March 20)
Tenderhearted and empathetic, Pisces teens have a very sweet nature. And the tendency to drag home every stray on the block, including the human unwashed. Even if you don't want to turn your guest room into a halfway house, it's hard not to applaud the sentiment involved. Flaky, seldom ambitious, creative and sweet, it probably makes sense for a parent to set up a trust fund in case they don't exactly grow up. But don't worry, Mom and Dad. Pisces are beloved and can usually crash on a friend's couch for a year or two.