A while back I was doing a great deal of reflection on the planet Neptune. Someone close to me was going through transiting Neptune in the sky opposing his Venus, while simultaneously being conjunct his Ascendant. He was suffering. He was lost and confused. For the first time in his tightly controlled life he had truly let love in (Neptune opposite Venus). So what was the problem? He had done this in such an all-consuming way that he suffered total identity loss in the process (Neptune conjunct Ascendant). Love made him crazy. He had to succumb to a personal breakdown to reveal an open heart. And once his heart was so open ... so vulnerable ... he didn't know how to cope. He was swimming in the ocean of Neptune, and at that very moment, Neptune was swallowing him whole. He was flooded with feeling.
What I wish he could have seen, however, is that, although he may have be broken, he was not destroyed. In fact, it is only the shell of our physical self-defenses that are blown apart during a difficult Neptune transit. What is dissolved is that chunk that keeps us most disconnected from our soul. What really happens, underneath all of the erosion, is that when Neptune crashes into your horoscope you are broken ... open. The soul is exposed in a way that deregulates it from the physical being. Why? Because being vulnerable is not comfortable for us silly mortals. Ah, but Neptune has this way of dissolving every wall we've built up ... or tried to.
This isn't a bad thing. In fact, the entire point of a Neptune transit is to get us closer to divinity in some way. Neptune in its most beautiful expression is spiritual awakening; the ability to unconditionally love and to absolve oneself of any feelings of guilt and disappointment so that we can focus on the light. Our light.
Life is a maze
I remember several years ago when I experienced transiting Neptune square my Sun (vitality and self) and Mercury (mind, communication). I never felt so lost and confused in my entire life. Everything that had defined my structured world up until that point suddenly evaporated into the ethers. It was as if I had been informed that the life I had been living was a grand illusion. But I couldn't believe it at the time. I tried to choose the delusion because I convinced myself it was safer. The irony of that time period is that, while I lost my former existence (typical of difficult Neptune transits) it was the process of losing all I thought I treasured that helped me get closer to my soul. The more I leaned on my faith, the more I was comforted. Indeed, the advice I was given by colleagues during that time was to "Let go and let God." This is classic Neptune.
Body and mind
Neptune transits not only open you up spiritually, but they also open you up psychically. You might be overwhelmed with your capacity to be empathic or to have precognitive "knowing." The key to successfully harnessing this wave of sensitivity is to give it a place in your world. For me, it was during those Neptune transits that I lost my former self but became a professional astrologer. I even did a research study and lecture on astrological indicators of psychic ability in the horoscope! I was broken as a person for sure during those years, but the universe knew it needed to break open the part of me that wasn't serving my spirit. My soul and soul's purpose was underneath the structures that my ego had built. When these structures suffocate your soul, the universe tends to deliver a Neptune transit.
And so it was also with that man who I love dearly. I know he couldn't see this for himself because when you're drowning in your Neptune transit, clarity often remains elusive. All I could do is counsel him to keep the faith. The events in his life that were happening make him feel as if he had lost himself ... but it's actually the opposite. Neptune erodes what it must so that we can be vulnerable and open enough to actually finding our true self -- the self that connects to our soul and to the divine.
True, Neptune casts a fog over us. But when the fog lifts we see clearly. We need the fog to allow time for that divine intervention. Are you going through a difficult Neptune transit of your own these days? If so, my advice is simple. Even when you're sinking, faith doesn't have to. Let hope float.